


Tf2 Amino Crack Ships

by Saltiest_Salt



Category: Original Work
Genre: Amino, Crack Fic, Don't Read This, F/M, Fish has the mouth of a sailor, Fishing, Friend Fiction, Gay lake, I'm so sorry, M/M, Memes, No one should take this seriously, Please Don't Kill Me, tf2, tf2 amino
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-09-19 08:21:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9429710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saltiest_Salt/pseuds/Saltiest_Salt
Summary: Just a bunch of crack ships involving the members of the tf2 amino community. I'm so sorry.





	1. 50 Shades Of Gay (Fish/Doc)

Fish had long ago decided that things could never get any worse, that things could only get better, then he met Doc.   
Things started going downhill on a crisp fall day when the chill of winter hadn’t yet reached him. Fish had been sitting on an old park bench, watching the people pass as he simply waited for plot purposes. A swift chill ran up his back and a child like laugh rang in his ears, causing him to jump. “Who’s there fucknut,” He cried out in question. Another laugh seemed to fly by in the breeze, “I’ll stick a dildo shank up your fruity ass if you don’t come out,” he exclaimed irritably.   
“If you say so,” the higher pitched voice said before an almost see through boi appeared a few inches away from Fish’s face.   
“AHH WHAT THE FUCK,” Fish screamed manly, stepping back. The boi only floated closer before reaching his hand out to Fish.  
“Hello, I’m Doc. Nice to meet you, do you like memes,” he questioned quickly, not giving Fish time to answer.  
“I’m Fish, but hell yeah! Memes are the shit,” he exclaimed brightly. He went to shake the smol dark haired boi’s hand, only for his to go through it. “What-”  
“Finally someone who likes memes, check this out,” he ripped his hand away to pull his shirt up. On his chest in tiny lettering was the entire Bee Movie script. “Isn’t it awesome,” he questioned happily, his bright eyes shining behind his glasses.  
“Fuck yeah Boi, where’d you get it done,” he questioned, reaching up to touch his non-existing abs fix his glasses to see clearer.   
“I got it when I went Hell for my first deathday,” he smiled before sweeping in beside Fish.   
“Wait, deathday? What the fuck is that you nub” he questioned trying to push Doc away, only to have his hand go through him. “What the fuck?”  
“Oh yeah, you’re a living person, I forgot. Well a deathday is the anniversary of your death, like you birthday, but not. Today’s my second deathday actually, that’s why I’m here. I finally get to roam the world of the living again, I’m happy, everyone back in the land of the dead people stopped hanging out with me. I just had to find an anchor to stay here and I did,” he said quickly, words running into one another. Fish stood there for a moment, attempting to process all that the smol ghost boi said.   
“I’m strangely okay with this, but what did you even use as a vessel,” he asked curiously, glaring at the ghost when he got even closer.   
“That’s obvious isn’t it Fish Sticks? It’s you, I made my anchor a human so I could go anywhere,” he exclaimed.   
“Oh fuck no you mob muncher! I’m not okay with this,” Fish shrieked throwing his hands up into the air in defiance.   
“Sorry Fish, but you’re not getting rid of me that easily. You’re stuck with me until you die, I’m your little gay sea otter now,” he giggled. The Fish grabbed his head and started pulling at his dark brown hair, mentally screaming.   
“This has to be some sort of nightmare, this can’t be real,” he muttered walking away from the annoying gay sea otter ghost boi.   
“Hey wait Fish! You’re going to fast,” the ghost cried before hopping onto a ghost unicycle and riding up to the other. “Oh shit waddup Fish Sticks, it’s your boi Doc.” Fish broke into a run, not caring about the cries and memes that came from Doc’s undead mouth. He was running so fast he didn’t even hear the sound of horns blaring and brakes screeching as he ran onto the street. A sharp pain flowed through his body, sending him into the air, only to land with a sickening crack as his body leaped across the pavement. He let out a groan as his vision darkened and his eardrums seemed to vibrate. Doc quickly rode over and attempted to look over Fish for wounds but his hands went through his anchor. “Hey Fish, c’mon stay up I need you as an anchor if you don’t live I have to wait another year for a new one, so stay with me,” he said frantically.   
“Shut up Shrimp dick, just tell me what type of truck I got hit by,” he grumbled, his voice hoarse.   
“But why-”  
“Just do it or I’ll smother your stupid transparent face in a blender full of whale spunk,” he threatened as he heard the footfalls of people drawing near. The ghost boi was only gone for a second before he appeared again.  
“It was a grapefruit truck, but why” he questioned in panic.  
“Ah, I can die happily,” Fish sighed and let himself go, his soul leaving his body as he heard muffled voices talking and felt people holding his arms. 

Fish opened his eyes to see what looked to be an amusement park he looked up to see a large sign with the words: “WELCOME TO HELL.” “Well this is a bit different than I expected, but definitely not something that surprises me,” he muttered.   
“Fish,” a voice cried out causing him to cringe, “we’re at Hell together!” Fish let out a groan and started to hit his head against one of the poles keeping the sign up. “Oh my God look the “Train of Broken Dreams” is open, so is “Stoner’s Paradise,” he paused. “WE CAN HAVE A WEEDING!” He quickly got down on one knee, “Fish, will you join me and have a weeding?” Fish just stood there for a moment, debating whether life, or death rather, could get any worse.   
“Lmao, sure” he replied before grabbing the gay sea otter’s arm and walking into the amusement park known as Hell.

The End


	2. Just A Fishing Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just fishing, I promise. (No I don't.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by my bois Space and Texas, mostly Space.

It was a chilly day on the lake as the waves rocked the boat back and forth. The warmth of summer had faded into the crisp and light freeze of fall. Two fishing lines were casted out into the dark water. Just a simple fishing trip.  
When a particularity cold gust of air shook the boat, Texas buried himself in his jacket to try to protect his skin from the chill as much as he could. Glancing over at Space, the man gave a small frown, the freezing cold didn't seem to be affecting the robot other than the fact his eye was slightly dimmer than usual, but that was almost unnoticeable. His frown turned into a smile before he looked back out onto the water. “Do you think we'll catch anything?” He asked, fiddling with his reel.   
Space made a whirring noise that sounded not unlike a hum, or perhaps it was just fans inside of him to make sure his system didn't get overheated. “Most likely, we will, but it's unlikely it will be anything other than rainbow trout. They've infested the lake ever since the others have dubbed it “Gay Lake,” and they wonder why I'm disappointed in them.” His answer was curt and robotic, a tone of tiredness and disappointment in it. Texas snorted at the statement, giving a light chuckle.   
Suddenly a sharp tug came from the man's line, causing him to almost let go of his pole. With a shout, he pulled back on it, reeling in. With a sharp “snap” his line broke, and with the sudden lack of fight, Texas fell backwards. Just as he was about to fall into the water, Space grabbed the man's hand, letting him hang just inches about water for a moment before pulling him up to sit next to him. One hand on his fishing pole, the other still holding Texas’ hand.   
“Thanks,” he said quietly, a light blush dawning his face as he felt the cold metal on his hand.   
“It was no problem, I can't lose someone I'm not disappointed in. Otherwise I'd be left with those idiots,” he replied simply.   
A look of shock took over Texas’ face as he stared at the robot. “I don't disappoint you?” He asked, inquisitive.  
“Texas, you are the only person I'm not disappointed in, the all the others are constantly making me regret life choices.” He said, not looking away from the water.   
“Oh,” the human said softly, they didn't say anything after that, instead just fishing while watching the water.

**Author's Note:**

> Join the community if you haven't I guess, it's fun.


End file.
